This post is about getting you to stop letting your weight dictate how you enjoy your life. For so many of us, our weight tells us whether to be happy, stressed, embarrassed or guilty.

I remember a few years ago, I had just finished an awesome workout at the gym after a night of going out and partying with friends. I was feeling pretty accomplished that I’d gotten out of bed on a Saturday to hit my favorite class; that takes some willpower! I was walking home, feeling good, reminiscing about the night before, until I caught a glimpse of myself in a store window. I saw a bloated stomach and arms that weren’t anything close to what I wanted them to be. Just like that, my entire mood changed. I felt disgusted, guilty and ashamed that I’d splurged the night before and hadn’t stuck to my healthy “diet”.

Now, what’s crazy about this story as I look back on it, is that from the moment I left the gym feeling great to the moment I caught that glimpse in the mirror, nothing physical had changed. Yet, I went from feeling accomplished and happy with myself, to feeling angry, degraded and ashamed, all because of how I thought I looked!

For many of us, our weight determines how we feel and how we approach the world. It convinces us that we can’t have the life that we want because of the body that we have. I can’t go to that pool party until I lose 10 pounds. I can’t start to date until I look sexier and feel more confident. I can’t wear sexy lingerie until I look like a victoria secret model. Or, I won’t feel confident at work until I look better.

These are thoughts that can hold us back from really living our lives and that can also sabotage us when we are trying to lose weight! I’m here to tell you that if you start living the life that you want now, and if you address the emotional voids that you are trying to fill with food, then you will easily find your natural weight.

Guess what?! You don’t need to be thin or weigh less to be truly happy. You need to do those things that you are dreaming of doing when you’re 20 pounds less, now! That’s when the weight will begin to fall off.

Now, why is this so hard to do? Because it really requires a shift in our lives; a full on lifestyle change. Why are we turning to ice cream at 9PM? Or why do we choose the chips instead of the brussel sprouts? On the surface, it might seem obvious, they taste good! But when we take a second to really think about it, food is a perfect roadmap of our feelings. What emotion are you trying to fill with your food? And how are you letting that sabotage your goals?

The billion dollar diet and food industry has led us to believe that if we put all of our energy into a diet all of our life dreams will come true. But, when you’re on a diet, you aren’t tending to your dreams or focusing on your emotional needs. Most of the time you’re just thinking about what you can’t eat and when you’re allowed to eat next.

So, how do we stop letting our weight dictate our lives and get back in tune with what our bodies really need? Plus get healthy fast? Start to look inward. 

Going on a diet doesn’t work unless you address your emotional needs too. If you feel like it’s time to address those needs, then start asking yourself the really hard questions. What's going on in my life that is making me unhappy? What can I do to start to make changes so that I can TRULY be myself and find freedom in my life? What's really causing me to reach for the unhealthy food or that extra drink at night? 

These might be some of the hardest questions that you ever ask yourself, but if you don't, then you'll never truly find peace with your body. So, grab a pen and some paper and start writing down your answers to these questions and begin making small changes so that your weight no longer dictates your life.